"I loved you, you made me, hate me. You gave me, hate, see?. It saved me and these tears are deadly.You feel that? I rip back, every time you tried to steal that. You feel bad? you feel sad? I’m sorry,hell no fuck that! It was my heart, it was my life, it was my start, it was your knife. This strife it dies, this life and these lies. And these lungs have sung this song for too long, and its true Ihurt too, remember I loved you!"
this is a shitty day that has started off bad...woke up with a pounding headache ....then a so called friend decided that im DRAM? wtf?! and now we arnt friends.....
i cnt take this.....i dnt kno what your expecting outta me.... i cant deal with loosing a friend... ive lost enough this year... GOD i cant take this! y should i be the only one suffering frm this loss?
whitney, the only drama ive caused is because of your shit! trying to help you makes me be drama? wow .....seriously stop tryn to kiss their ass when right in frnt of you.... you have people that are actually there and care about you
i love you .....please stop this foolisness.......i care about you....and i dnt wnt to loose you... your one of my first real friends i've ever had......
holding emotions in is apperently what i do best...but for some reason this is really getting to me...gahh i cnt deal with tis right now...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
Monday, December 29, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
"every start's got it's ending even when we've learned to rise above it all"
god, im so sick of kno itall stuck up bitches! seriously ppl, you dnt even have a fucking clue at all bout what is going on! the only fucking thing you have is trying to controll every last detail because you kno what i should do! well fuck that!
seriously live my life for at least an hour and then youll see you were dead wrong about all your accusations! i know more shit than youll ever kno. i kno about shit that even i regret hearing about!
get ALL the facts first before you call me ungreatful! i constantly thank j for everything she does for me and just because i was mad doesnt give you any right at all to make me out to be the bad guy! because ha maybe you should sit and take a good look in the mirror and then you'll se how selfish and obsessive YOU are! and how bad your hurting the people who actually do give a fuck about you! for once take into concideration about your real friends feelings and stop worrying about a fantasy thats NEVER gnna happen for you!
i love you and all whitney but seriously your hurtin us.....and how you talked to me earlier was bullshit... you didnt kno all the facts about the situation your self....so dnt give me a hard time about it... in a little upset still.....and im not gnna appologize for the way i was acting because i did have a reason to be upset and she agrees with me....
im still ur friend and maybe you should start listening to our adviuce more....idk...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
seriously live my life for at least an hour and then youll see you were dead wrong about all your accusations! i know more shit than youll ever kno. i kno about shit that even i regret hearing about!
get ALL the facts first before you call me ungreatful! i constantly thank j for everything she does for me and just because i was mad doesnt give you any right at all to make me out to be the bad guy! because ha maybe you should sit and take a good look in the mirror and then you'll se how selfish and obsessive YOU are! and how bad your hurting the people who actually do give a fuck about you! for once take into concideration about your real friends feelings and stop worrying about a fantasy thats NEVER gnna happen for you!
i love you and all whitney but seriously your hurtin us.....and how you talked to me earlier was bullshit... you didnt kno all the facts about the situation your self....so dnt give me a hard time about it... in a little upset still.....and im not gnna appologize for the way i was acting because i did have a reason to be upset and she agrees with me....
im still ur friend and maybe you should start listening to our adviuce more....idk...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
"God of time, am I lost in your eyes?"
haha so ok lol im still here with jocelyn lol and were sitting here playing on subeta pre usual lol
then all the sudden j said sumthn about her mom having a beaver?! hahah rotflmao! seriously lol what the fuck ....
suposibley (w-e on the spelling...if u dnt like it then fukk off :)) hahah so for the past half an hour weve been sitting here laughing like mental patients lol
then we got on the aim account and asked her mom what the word beaver meant to her lol she prolly thinks were on crack or sumthing haha
me and jocelyn always manage to have hella funn when i come over to visit and we aint going to bed again tonight so fuck that shit in the ass!!
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
then all the sudden j said sumthn about her mom having a beaver?! hahah rotflmao! seriously lol what the fuck ....
suposibley (w-e on the spelling...if u dnt like it then fukk off :)) hahah so for the past half an hour weve been sitting here laughing like mental patients lol
then we got on the aim account and asked her mom what the word beaver meant to her lol she prolly thinks were on crack or sumthing haha
me and jocelyn always manage to have hella funn when i come over to visit and we aint going to bed again tonight so fuck that shit in the ass!!
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
Saturday, December 27, 2008
"Everywhere I Go Bitches Always Know"
ok haha im back once again, haha todays been kinda a blur...... like what the hell have i even done today?! im am one motha fuckn lazy bitch......
take a guess at what i did? ........Subeta ... i kno i should be ashamed of myself but i just cannot help myself when it comes down to that god forsaken website...it has some weird hold on me... idk
Jocelyns house again tonight lol we just got done playin Rock Band lol she got her ASS handed 2 her i am the champ... woot wooot! i do enjopy a good challeng ... metallica is good on that game its very sly with its green red yellow blue combinations...oh u thought you had me but ohh no not this time u caniving sneeky bastard!!!!
lol i am quite blah today dont kno wat to do.......so i am occupying my time with bloging and am A&W root beer... indeed rootbeer is very goooood indeed.......
im done with this randome segment of my lifes work...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
take a guess at what i did? ........Subeta ... i kno i should be ashamed of myself but i just cannot help myself when it comes down to that god forsaken website...it has some weird hold on me... idk
Jocelyns house again tonight lol we just got done playin Rock Band lol she got her ASS handed 2 her i am the champ... woot wooot! i do enjopy a good challeng ... metallica is good on that game its very sly with its green red yellow blue combinations...oh u thought you had me but ohh no not this time u caniving sneeky bastard!!!!
lol i am quite blah today dont kno wat to do.......so i am occupying my time with bloging and am A&W root beer... indeed rootbeer is very goooood indeed.......
im done with this randome segment of my lifes work...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
"there's no other place that I'd rather be"
omg! as i sti here this very moment i take all wat i said back about you my dear Subeta!!!
subeta waz down for quite a while tonight....but ...ohh yes it.... it is baaaaaaaack!!!
oh dear sweet subeta
how i have missed thee...
you left us but now your back
do not leave again
for i have missed you so..
oh my dearest subeta!
i have longed to check my account
thank you my dearest subeta
thank you for returning again!
-Amanda 12/27/2008 6:21am
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
subeta waz down for quite a while tonight....but ...ohh yes it.... it is baaaaaaaack!!!
oh dear sweet subeta
how i have missed thee...
you left us but now your back
do not leave again
for i have missed you so..
oh my dearest subeta!
i have longed to check my account
thank you my dearest subeta
thank you for returning again!
-Amanda 12/27/2008 6:21am
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
"Peace, bitch!"
well, i suppose since its 5:30 am on December 27th.. then its quite possible, that maybe its reasonable that im either gnna stay awake and pull an all nighter...or i can be a lazy bitch <<;; and take the easy way out and go to bed..... well i say NO! i shall not! for one in my pitiful winter vacation i shall stay awake like teenagers now days should on there vacations!
so for the past umm 10 or so hours ive been sitting here (at jocelyns house) listening to Hollywood Undead! well if you have not already figured me out then i shall once again hint that they are my favorite band t this time of my life! "i dont give a fuck if your drunk or not" biitchez!!!! so take that wahaha lolz
in case anyones reading this and thinking to them selves "Amanda's really cool ..i wonder what she is doing now?? wt exactlys on her mind?" well ill tell you! im sitting lazily in a computer chair waiting for freshly made whipped cream for some gormet hot cocoa! ... and once again you still ask "whats on yourmind?" well.......Im thinking about Subeta! there you happy i said it! Subeta Subeta SUBETA!......
im sorry............that wasnt very mature of me....... that damn crafty Subeta! horrible nasty habbit that fucking subeta! i should kick tha habbit...........but then again <<;;;
well i think i'll cancle the cocoa and just have a nice bowl of freshly made whipped cream with a sprinkle of brown sugar on top lol.....
omgness!!!!! its like a big fluffy bowl of icecream minus the ice ....heheso its just fluffy cream which infact is what whipped cream is suppose to be!!!!!.....
ok sooooo i guess im being a lil randome....so i'll close this little bloggy the sme way i plan on closing All my blogs then...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
so for the past umm 10 or so hours ive been sitting here (at jocelyns house) listening to Hollywood Undead! well if you have not already figured me out then i shall once again hint that they are my favorite band t this time of my life! "i dont give a fuck if your drunk or not" biitchez!!!! so take that wahaha lolz
in case anyones reading this and thinking to them selves "Amanda's really cool ..i wonder what she is doing now?? wt exactlys on her mind?" well ill tell you! im sitting lazily in a computer chair waiting for freshly made whipped cream for some gormet hot cocoa! ... and once again you still ask "whats on yourmind?" well.......Im thinking about Subeta! there you happy i said it! Subeta Subeta SUBETA!......
im sorry............that wasnt very mature of me....... that damn crafty Subeta! horrible nasty habbit that fucking subeta! i should kick tha habbit...........but then again <<;;;
well i think i'll cancle the cocoa and just have a nice bowl of freshly made whipped cream with a sprinkle of brown sugar on top lol.....
omgness!!!!! its like a big fluffy bowl of icecream minus the ice ....heheso its just fluffy cream which infact is what whipped cream is suppose to be!!!!!.....
ok sooooo i guess im being a lil randome....so i'll close this little bloggy the sme way i plan on closing All my blogs then...
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not"
haha soo umm this is exciting yea? my first blog....we'll i dnt understand what you bastards see in it but i suppose i'll learn 2 love it? .................we'll this shitty years finally almost possibly maybe over! thank the lord! i just praise god for all the friends and support ive been given throught the year and especially the last few excruciating months of this god forsaken year! ok lol enough emo'ness from me haha.
ummmmmmm...info time yes? I am the amazing cool wonderfully sarcastic Amanda lol ..i can sometimes be called ...yes dare i say it a "subeta junkie!" horrible nasty habbit that fucking subeta! stay away from it! lol i am rather enfatuated with Hollywood Undead hence the "i don't give a fuck if your drunk or not" lyric hahah ohhhh ill start saying that dame lyric for dayzzzz lol. twilights my favorite movie but im not one of those crazy obsessive phycho bitches haha ohhh you kno damn well who you guys are so dnt deny WHO YOU TRULY ARE!!!
my life only has meaning because of my friends... they've helped me sooo much these last few months thanx whit haley kammy And especially you J...you are always just a call away and ikno if i ever needed anythn youd jump at the chance to help me out and for that i love you! you and your family mean the world to me. and i thank god every day that i have you guys, you guys are like a second family...tthank you! i dnt even kno how to repay you for all that you've done for me since ma Dad passed!.....i dnt even kno what to say exept thank you....
Whitney, i love you kidd your like a sister to me... and yes even you have done quite a bit for me...your one of the very few that i can talk to about my problems ...and i kno your always there to listen... thank you! i need to learn to show my feelings better and by talking to you it really does help! i kno we've been fighting quite a bit latly but you gotta understand i only have your best interests at heart! i love you! and id never do anything to hurt you!
You kno....this year hasnt exactly been the highlight of my life? its still rather hard to think that my dads gone...every so often i have a point in which i think none of it had happened and he's in the other room or just at work...September seemed like an eternity from now...but its only been 3 months and some times i forget the little things about him...but i still think about the fun me and him had earlier on this year and i'll always cherish those moments! this is a subject that i try not to talk about...it hurts....but at least hes in heaven ...or so thats what i think and what i pray...i'll always have him in my heart...R.I.P Fredrick Thomas Sawyer "and here at the end, at the end of the hurt,all the pain aint the same...."
Eddie Trevor and Johnathan deserved to have more respect from me this year... i aint to proud to admit that i've been quite a bitch this year...(just thought id add a little sumthn for the 3 of them haha even tho not one of them will ever read thizz shittt lol) "And i wanna go back to the start,back where we started from,and i know its been so long, i was wrong, i was wrong,i was wrong all along..."
this blog that i have been writing is basically about my life... my life is full of good shit and bad shit..and for the people that try to controll my life and what i do.....and what i say and i aint gnna put up with it.."my lips are sewn shut,i watch myself bleed,they push and pull, its killing me within.."... i controll y own life and what i do so if yall really wnna call some one fake and a follower look in the mirror u bitches ain no better than the insults your handin out..ahh ha!"Bitches I hope you know,I won’t stop till I hit that hoe,Baby come say hello "....
so i've been thinking whats a good statement to end this god forsaken blog?? then it hit me!?
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
ummmmmmm...info time yes? I am the amazing cool wonderfully sarcastic Amanda lol ..i can sometimes be called ...yes dare i say it a "subeta junkie!" horrible nasty habbit that fucking subeta! stay away from it! lol i am rather enfatuated with Hollywood Undead hence the "i don't give a fuck if your drunk or not" lyric hahah ohhhh ill start saying that dame lyric for dayzzzz lol. twilights my favorite movie but im not one of those crazy obsessive phycho bitches haha ohhh you kno damn well who you guys are so dnt deny WHO YOU TRULY ARE!!!
my life only has meaning because of my friends... they've helped me sooo much these last few months thanx whit haley kammy And especially you J...you are always just a call away and ikno if i ever needed anythn youd jump at the chance to help me out and for that i love you! you and your family mean the world to me. and i thank god every day that i have you guys, you guys are like a second family...tthank you! i dnt even kno how to repay you for all that you've done for me since ma Dad passed!.....i dnt even kno what to say exept thank you....
Whitney, i love you kidd your like a sister to me... and yes even you have done quite a bit for me...your one of the very few that i can talk to about my problems ...and i kno your always there to listen... thank you! i need to learn to show my feelings better and by talking to you it really does help! i kno we've been fighting quite a bit latly but you gotta understand i only have your best interests at heart! i love you! and id never do anything to hurt you!
You kno....this year hasnt exactly been the highlight of my life? its still rather hard to think that my dads gone...every so often i have a point in which i think none of it had happened and he's in the other room or just at work...September seemed like an eternity from now...but its only been 3 months and some times i forget the little things about him...but i still think about the fun me and him had earlier on this year and i'll always cherish those moments! this is a subject that i try not to talk about...it hurts....but at least hes in heaven ...or so thats what i think and what i pray...i'll always have him in my heart...R.I.P Fredrick Thomas Sawyer "and here at the end, at the end of the hurt,all the pain aint the same...."
Eddie Trevor and Johnathan deserved to have more respect from me this year... i aint to proud to admit that i've been quite a bitch this year...(just thought id add a little sumthn for the 3 of them haha even tho not one of them will ever read thizz shittt lol) "And i wanna go back to the start,back where we started from,and i know its been so long, i was wrong, i was wrong,i was wrong all along..."
this blog that i have been writing is basically about my life... my life is full of good shit and bad shit..and for the people that try to controll my life and what i do.....and what i say and i aint gnna put up with it.."my lips are sewn shut,i watch myself bleed,they push and pull, its killing me within.."... i controll y own life and what i do so if yall really wnna call some one fake and a follower look in the mirror u bitches ain no better than the insults your handin out..ahh ha!"Bitches I hope you know,I won’t stop till I hit that hoe,Baby come say hello "....
so i've been thinking whats a good statement to end this god forsaken blog?? then it hit me!?
"i don't give a f**k if your drunk or not" .....Peace Bitches!!
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